I'm feeling uncomfortable asking for help.

  • 1 December 2021
  • 13 replies
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Is putting your business that everything is in fact not fine out in the open difficult for anyone else? My pride is thick and the only person I've ever felt comfortable asking for money is my mom... but she says sometimes you need help and it's ok to ask


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@Jeffrey Williams You’re not alone in this. I was just talking to @Bill8267  in another thread about the same thing. Bill, do you have any words of wisdom? 

I kind of feel that way too. I just published my page, and realized that I had put it off for almost Five years. Because of my circumstances, I don't have many friends, and no family who can really help, so it is a little awkward asking for help. Not sure I could this on social media. 

 

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@AMITYSHARK75 Asking for help can definitely be tough, but it’s also very empowering. The truth is, most people will need some sort of support at some point in their life, especially if you fall into difficult circumstances.

From my experience, you need to wear the armor of confidence and believe in your fundraiser. Convincing yourself that the fundraiser is necessary is the first step in convincing others.  

 

 

 

@Jules I appreciate that. Well, it's up now, I just need to wait and see what happens..I just don't know anyone(personally) that could contribute. I'm not going to hijack Jeffrey's topic, but I will just say that I was under the impression that donations came from folks who visited the site.

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@AMITYSHARK75 It’s a common misunderstanding that donations come from visitors to GoFundMe, since there are times when strangers will donate to a page. Usually this happens after the fundraiser has raised a lot of money, or made it to the local news where people will see the story. 

 

Often times folks will underestimate who many people they know. If you have old classmates, previous coworkers, or neighbors. Those people are all worth reaching out to through text message, phone call, or even by hanging your fundraiser poster throughout your street. 

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How often do you share your fundraiser on social media? I did really well the first 2-3 days and then nothing since. I also had a hard time asking for help. I went as far as writing my own story but pretending like I was a friend writing it. I plan to do the updates myself but I don’t want to be in peoples face every day and I don’t want to annoy anyone by asking them to share my page so often. But I also know I need to keep it out there, that someone will see mg feed today that didn’t see it last week. Any tips on how often y’all are sharing would be appreciated.

thanks,

donna

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@Donna Harris This is such a great topic..the cadence of sharing. That would make for a good poll to do for the community. 

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@Donna Harris This is such a great topic..the cadence of sharing. That would make for a good poll to do for the community. 

 

Jules I agree! I am very interested in seeing what others think.

 

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I’ve been very anxious about starting my campaign as well. Asking for help is hard, and I don’t want to be a bother to anyone. I guess the only advice I can give is to just bite the bullet and post on all of your social media (if you have any) and ask people to share your campaign. It’s not easy, but you’ll get through it. 

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I’ve been very anxious about starting my campaign as well. Asking for help is hard, and I don’t want to be a bother to anyone. I guess the only advice I can give is to just bite the bullet and post on all of your social media (if you have any) and ask people to share your campaign. It’s not easy, but you’ll get through it. 

Once you get started it does seem to get easier each time you post an  update it and share. However my  friends are not sharing like I thought they would. I have even been ignored by those I was sure would help out, closest friends and family. So I don’t know what I am doing wrong. 
I would never ever ask anyone for financial help unless I was desperate, which I am. I am in a fight for my life and I am all alone. No partner, no family except one sister. And true close friends I can really depend are dropping like flies since I have been sick. People I thought were my friends accuse me of lying about being ill. It all started last year about this time and after so many symptoms manifested at one time we thought I had multiple sclerosis however that was ruled out yesterday but my neurologist. They have ruled out several things and now we’re just doing test after test after test to try to find out what’s wrong. My MRIs shows severe brain damage that has affected my every day life drastically. My vision deteriorated to the point that I can no longer drive and have to beg for rides everywhere, especially to my countless doctors appointments. I had to quit my job and haven’t worked since June. 
While dealing with symptoms and searching for answers I was  diagnosed with chronic leukemia. But still no answers to the multiple Neurological problems that I’m facing. Including brain damage, memory loss, loss of my fine motor skills and cognition. Just to name a few things. 
With MS being ruled out,  I feel like I’m starting over at square one, only now I have leukemia to go with it.
I have NEVER felt so alone in all my life. Not even after I lost an infant son many years ago. 

I know it’s the holidays and people are strapped for cash at the moment but I see campaigns for some pretty outlandish and even selfish fundraisers raising stupid amounts of money in just a matter of days.

Some with the same illness and circumstances as I am in. How do they do this? Where do you find the crowds that just look for fundraisers to donate to. I really think I have a good cause and I have tried my hardest to keep it interesting and not overly sad or poor pitiful me sounding. I am open to any tips and advice.

And I wish you all good luck. I love that they have this awesome community and I am trying to learn all I can and I am also glad to help anyone I can.

This is my first time on this forum so please accept my apology for my mistakes! It was EXTREMELY difficult putting myself and my story out there for the world to see. I may as well have been standing on a street corner holding a sign- that’s how I felt. I do not like asking for money. I would rather clean a toilet. And that’s what I was doing until I had to stop working for chemotherapy treatments. I digress. Getting your story out there is difficult for some, maybe try social media? Text people? Hold little fund raisers - I saw one for gift wrapping? That looks cool & probably costs next too nothing in overhead. My point is be resourceful! Your life depends on it. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this! Best of luck! 

Is putting your business that everything is in fact not fine out in the open difficult for anyone else? My pride is thick and the only person I've ever felt comfortable asking for money is my mom... but she says sometimes you need help and it's ok to ask

Believe me I understand I’m a very sociable person however for a long time I’ve been sort of a recluse the few people who know me is by sight because I don’t like to let people in right now I no longer care about my pride I know that My daughters aren’t aloud to bring friends to visit because I feel shame at the lack of furniture I haven’t even attempted to meet anyone in person because again shame I’ve been raising my children alone for 10 years now and my medical conditions have been getting worse I’m at a point where if I have any chance of getting better or at least not get any worse I have to get my home in order and organized so that I finish raising my children and hopefully enjoy a long and healthy life 

This is my first time on this forum so please accept my apology for my mistakes! It was EXTREMELY difficult putting myself and my story out there for the world to see. I may as well have been standing on a street corner holding a sign- that’s how I felt. I do not like asking for money. I would rather clean a toilet. And that’s what I was doing until I had to stop working for chemotherapy treatments. I digress. Getting your story out there is difficult for some, maybe try social media? Text people? Hold little fund raisers - I saw one for gift wrapping? That looks cool & probably costs next too nothing in overhead. My point is be resourceful! Your life depends on it. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this! Best of luck! 
 

I understand how you feel because of my disabilities I can no longer work I wish that I could the worst part for me is that when people look at me they don’t see someone who can’t work because I take medications regularly to make sure I don’t get worse and I try every day to get as much exercise as I am able to so I could at least be able to continue to care for my kids but if I could be working right now I would jump at the chance so I understand many of us who grew up working develop a sense of responsibility and don’t feel fully complete unless they know they earned their pay 

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